unSAMSONly Relationship


I recently watched episode 3 of the series ‘The Bible’ on which the story of Samson was told.


We all know Samson, the long-haired Hercules-like guy who fell in love with a woman who caused his downfall. Yes, that guy from the same well-known story Samson and Delilah. I used to find the story unappealing because before, I didn’t see it as a story of God’s victory but simply a story of a guy who chose his selfish desires which then led to his failure. To tell you the truth, I almost skipped the episode when I found out it is about Samson. Praise God I didn’t. After watching the episode I felt a little intrigued and decided to further read and reflect on his story in the Bible (Judges 13-16). Then and there I learned to appreciate and understand the story of Samson-and you know what, Samson’s story is a story that can actually relate to most people (especially the young adults) today.

Short review, Samson was born from a barren woman and is destined to save the Israelites by defeating the Philistines. He was instructed to be under the Nazarite oath*. Apparently, as long as he don’t cut his hair he was supplied with supernatural strength which enabled him to accomplish the prodigious feats recorded of him. He did follow the oath but always compromised on things, like instead of defeating the Philistines, he tried to coexist with them and even had a Philistine as a wife. That wife however was burned to death due to riddle issue (Judges 14-15) which made Samson angry. After some time then he met Delilah-another Philistine woman-and again fell in love. To make the long story short – Delilah was bribed by the Philistine lord to expose why Samson is strong. Delilah tricked Samson, Samson told Delilah, Delilah cut Samson’s hair, Samson lost his strength and was captured. His eyes then was gouged and was enslaved by the Philistines. Samson realized his mistakes and asks for the Lord’s pardon, he regained his strength and killed the Philistines together with him.


Brothers and sisters, like Samson we all have duties. Ours is to defeat all evil and negativities around us by being Christ-like as we proclaim and serve the Lord. And if Samson was aided with strength for his duty, we alike, are also aided by our God gifted wisdom/skills/talents/abilities.


The sad thing is that like Samson, we tend to compromise a lot. We think that we can coexist with the evil things around us. We think that its okay to sin a little from time to time. Most of the time we use our gifts not for the glory of God but for our own selfish desires (which by the way was what Samson also did most of the time). Most of us might even defend ourselves saying: “Well I still have the gifts from God so that means I’m not doing anything wrong”. The said logic is correct though flawed. Samson didn’t lose his strength until his hair was cut, which meant that for all his life he was faithful to the Nazarite oath. He was simply following the oath with God without fulfilling his duty. Much like the defensive logic above. Again, we should use our God gifted perks to do our duties for God not for ourselves. Faith to God isn’t enough, we have to fulfill our destiny.


Samson allowed himself to fall in love with a Philistine woman (twice) even when it was against his destiny. He compromised thinking he’s in love and God is love therefore he’s love is right. Finally, his thought backfired. Delilah tricked him.

We all have delilahs lurking around, and they would cause our downfall if welcomed. The delilahs I’m referring to are not people but wrong relationships. A relationship can be considered a delilah when:

It leads to sin
It does not focus on God
It does not pursue purity
It does not honor our partner
It is selfish and not patient
It is all about what we want not what God wants
We (or our partner) are not yet ready – spiritually and mentally.

Again, we tend to compromise when it comes to relationships. We tend to believe that we can make the ‘already wrong’ relationship right. We think that:

We’d learn to be matured inside the relationship
Knowing our partner more during the relationship is ok
We can pursue Christ while inside the wrong relationship
We can repent and stop the sins together with our partner
We can be the good influence to make the relationship right.

The truth is, struggle with wrong relationship will always be a losing battle. Samson did compromise, he thought everything will work out fine and this lead him to his loss. Compromising delilah will be the same for us. No matter how hard we fight, time will come and it will trick us leading to our downfall-sinDelilahs would prevent us in doing our duties. They will steal our intimacy with God and make it theirs. They will poison our knowledge of what’s truly right. We shouldn’t compromise in relationships. We shouldn’t welcome delilahs.


After being tricked, Samson’s hair was cut-losing his strength. He was then captured and enslaved by the Philistines.

Most of us might already have been tricked by our delilahs. We weren’t able to fulfill our duty to be Christ-like. We might now be living a life of sin. We are blinded and enslaved by these sins that we find it hard to see and focus on God. We might think that it is too late for us to do what God wants us to. At worst, we might even be too comfortable with being enslaved that we do not wish to be restored. If that is the case then again I say, you are blinded.

Being blinded however allowed Samson to reflect. In darkness he found God.

Brothers and sisters, blinded and enslaved as we are, let us still try to find God. Let us accept the fact that we failed and that we are sinners. Let us humble ourselves and pray asking for God to show Himself to us. Let us asks for our redemption and renewal.


The one good thing I realized after reflecting is that as much as we are alike with Samson. There is one big difference in the end. Samson asks God for pardon and using his last strength and breath, he managed to somehow recover and fulfill his duty to kill the Philistines. This is where the big difference comes.


Like Samson, we should also ask God to recover and fulfill our duty. But unlike Samson, it doesn’t necessarily need to be the last nor does not necessarily mean that we have to die. The big difference is that now Jesus Christ already came and saved us. With Jesus dying on the cross, He was able to already save and pardon us. We now only have to ask for Christ’s mercy and be saved. We can ask for the Lord’s pardon but unlike Samson, thru Christ, we can be renewed.


I had failed relationships for many times now. I compromised on delilahs too many times that I can already call myself a veteran (something I ‘m not really proud of). I thought I can handle them with my own strength-boy was I wrong. We can never be successful in a relationship, much more in a wrong relationship. Only by being Christ-like and following His teachings can we have a successful relationship. Also, understanding these things would never be enough to avoid sins. Only by the grace and mercy of Christ can we truly be saved. Putting our lives under the true symbol of the cross and His death can we truly be empowered to fight and overcome our delilahs. I learned that the hard way.

Today, I tend to pursue the life of singleness as I know I’m still not ready. There are many delilahs around me but I continue to ask for the intervention of Christ. For now, I strive to grow and learn as much as possible for these are the things that would allow me to further serve the Lord and my future partner. Awesome friends and books like I Kissed Dating GoodbyeHow to Find Your One True Love, and Passion and Purity** guided and continue to guide me greatly in this battle.

I now believe that I have no business asking for a girl’s heart and exclusive affections if I’m not ready to consider marriage. Some people who hear my decision not to date until I’m ready for marriage assume that my heart must have broken. No, instead, my heart was made new by my Savior. The change in my way of thinking was the result of realizing the implications of belonging to Him. The Son of God died for me and it had to change everything-including my love life.


Brothers and sisters, true love isn’t just expressed in passionately whispered words or an intimate kiss or an embrace; before two people are married, love is expressed in self-control, patience, even words left unsaid. Let us then learn to love truly. I am not saying that I am right and you should do the same thing I’m doing regarding relationships. Rather, I encourage you to first seek maturity for by doing so, we lessen the chance to be tricked by the delilahs around us.

Also, while preparing yourself to be ready, as a single person you have plenty of time to grow and learn new stuffs. Grab the opportunities. Strengthen your gifts from God- to be a better person for God, for your future partner, and for everyone.

Let us not trust ourselves (but Christ and His teachings) when it comes to relationships.
Let us not wait for the delilahs to trick us- avoid them!
Let us immediately get away from blindness and slavery bounded by sins.
Let us ask Christ to renew ourselves and fight for what is right!
Let us fulfill our duties as God’s children!

I pray for you all
God bless!

Evan Ray T. Cabigon



(*) The Nazarite oath required that he was to be separated from the people and devoted exclusively to the service of the Lord. One vow of the Nazarite oath was not to cut the hair by which, Samson’s great strength was related to this vow.The oath required that he was to be separated from the people and devoted exclusively to the service of the Lord. One vow of the Nazarite oath was not to cut the hair by which, Samson’s great strength was related to this vow.

(**) Books Cited:
I Kissed Dating Goodbye – Joshua Harris
How to Find Your One True Love – Bo Sanchez
Passion and Purity – Elisabeth Elliot




  1. ” But they that wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” Isa 40:31


  1. PLEASE BE CAREFUL WITH YOUR HEART. | The Lily-White Princess

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